It's a Friday. 1:57 pm, and I'm getting ready for work. Even though I had just had two days off, I was still not ready to go back. There's something about having more than one consecutive day off that makes you feel like wanting to say in bed. :-) It was just like any other day. I even remember what I was wearing: lavender T-shirt, blue jean shorts, white socks and sneakers, an outfit I have yet to wear again (too painful, I suppose). Funny how a person can remember stuff like that. I can recall exactly what I was doing when the phone rang. I had just finished putting on my make-up and was about to put on my eyeshadow (it was purple--you know, to match the shirt) when the phone rang. I had dropped my tube of eyeshadow on the phone, and somehow, that had made the phone pick up. (damn smartphones.) It was my gynecologist's office. The lady's name was Rebecca or Rachel or something like that. She said that the results from my two tests came back. Oh. I had forgotten about them. (My bad!) Anyway, she told me that my Pap smear came back normal, so that was a relief. But the next few words are words that I will never forget: "We also got the results of the biopsy back, and it shows that you do have uterine cancer." I began crying and almost dropped the phone. I just could not believe it. I didn't want to believe it! Seriously, who wants to hear a cancer diagnosis at the age of 32? I was in the prime of my life: I had a (reasonably) good job, a great family, awesome friends...there was no room for cancer. None. But there it was. Those were the thoughts that were running through my mind as I was on the phone. Six minutes, 30 seconds that changed my life. Six lousy minutes!
As I remained on the phone, the words "uterine cancer" kept repeating themselves in my head. It didn't even seem real. It was like someone's idea of a really cruel joke. Well, it wasn't funny at all! I tried concentrating on the words the nurse (or whatever she was) was telling me. I was told that this was a very curable type of cancer, and that they were confident it was found early. I suppose that was my silver lining. But still, hearing those words can do something to a person's spirit. Your life is not the same after that. So many thoughts and emotions go through your mind: fear, anger, hostility, resentment, just to name a few. You feel like you're alone in this. But the truth is, no one is ever really alone. So many love you, and support you. It's not only your fight, but their fight, too. :-)
Kathy :-)
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