Saturday, October 6, 2012

Happy Thoughts

It's amazing how 24 hours can change a person and their outlook.  For 2 weeks, I was sad and bummed out...on the verge of going into depression.  I was angry, too.  I hated the fact that I had cancer and required the need for a radical hysterectomy.  I had plans for kids (one or two would have been nice), and this uterine cancer thing ruined my chances.  All sorts of thoughts were running through my mind.  Was I going to need chemo or radiation?  Was I going to die from this?  Did the cancer spread any?  So many thoughts.  I didn't want to think negatively, but sometimes I couldn't help it.  I was going stir-crazy, not knowing the results of the testing.  I even called the oncologist to see if I could get the results early, to no avail.  :-/  I finally went for my follow-up on Thursday, and I got my results.  When I was told that my cancer was at such a low stage I needed no further treatment, happy didn't even begin to describe it.  It was like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  I finally knew and I could live again!!!  Yay!!!  People who have never been in this position could not even possibly begin to understand how I felt.  I felt like I wasn't really living in those two weeks.  And that probably contributed to my depression.  :-(  But now, I've been happy and smiling nonstop.  Being told you don't need further treatment and that you are in remission does that to you.  :-)

*kathy*

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